It’s late. Or early, depending on which end of the day you are looking at it from. Personally, I’m trying to wind down from a busy night at work, so I can sleep before my long couple of days coming up. But, it’s giving me time to think, and remember.
Many years ago, when I was writing often (usually several hours a day, every day, instead of a few minutes if I’m lucky), I always had music playing. I also always wrote after work, somehow that’s always been my most creative time. It allowed me to decompress, to pour my emotions into what I was creating. It was catharsis.
Over the last few days, and most specifically today, I’ve been trying to look at why I shut myself off so much from being creative, and why did I stop listening to music? I can think of a few possibilities already: punishment and fear to start off with. But what I’ve had to look at the most right now, is that taking this step, merging the music and the creativity again is only the beginning to a long path to healing.
I think the reason I can do this now that is that I may finally be ready to face the demons of my past. I have a home where I am loved, supported and understood. But now, more than ever, I also have a way to communicate through all my mediums, and I can finally do what I have been wanting to do for most of my life. I can, hopefully, prayerfully, share my experiences to help others know that they are not alone.
Thank you all for sharing this path with me.